I felt beautiful this morning
Hair shiny, full
Lips kissable with gloss
Eyes just so
Skin flawless
Red, my favorite power color
I am invincible in this armor!
And to the mall I go
In search of new clothes
To complement my beauty
I search many stores
Stand in front of many mirrors
None which show the enchanment of this morning
When I left with armor
When I felt beautiful
Didn't I?
Oh they don't have that in my size
My husband hugs me close and whispers:
"I think you are beautiful. I love you. And your hair looks great."
I begin to cry.
God knows he fights a battle every day
To feel that way.
Home again with saddened spirit
Same mirror as this morning
Now shows a woman worn:
Flat hair, smudged mascara, bloodshot eyes
Chapped lips, thick hips and thighs.
Where did she go,
that beautiful woman of confidence I met today
Is gone, somewhere, maybe far away.
She tried coming out and the world did not agree with her
"This is the reality" they say.
"Oh."
She whispers as she turns away
And fades.
My Norman Rockwell
15 years ago
6 comments:
wrong.
you;re not fat, you're beautiful....
....just maybe not so much tater salad. hahah. only kidding.
april you were beautiful even when you were 9 months pregnant/
and even when you wore a god forbid size 4........
and i thought you were fat because???????
(i think i was probably just jealous that you were smaller than me)
I wrote a poem for your blog april...
"Tomorrow
Tomorrow
I love ya
Tomorrow
You're only a day away."
like it? I cant wait!!!!!
amy do you know we are the perfect mix?
Me: serious to the point of paralysis.
You: hilarious to the point of tears.
Leslie, i find sadness to be the best and often only inspiration for poems. they never come to me when I am happy. So, i don't walk around in this sad state of mind, i say it in the poem and try to move forward. I hope you don't think I'm like so depressed or something.It's just how it comes out on paper, its how i'm feeling in that moment. Plus, I take my pills like a good little girl! J/k
yeah when i was a size four i hated not having boobs. like, i had NO boobs , not even bumps. Like, the didn't make a miracle bra small enough for that nonaction. So you are right, i totally agree. it's not really size. i don't think i've ever liked my size, even when i was skinny i didn't feel beautiful. which makes it interesting that i still equate skinny with beautiful.
AprilMarie, I love you so much. And I don't have to work hard to think you're beautiful. This poem made me almost cry; God, I wish I knew how to get you to see what I see when I look at you.
Husband.
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